As I have prayed over the years about many things in my life, there were times when I wondered if God even heard me? Often, when I didn’t receive clear revelation or a favorable answer, I had to fight hard not to waiver.

I remember a time when I was raising my children while living and working in Columbia, S.C., thinking everything was finally okay. Almost simultaneous to that thought, everything came crashing down.

“What’s up, God? Am I not your daughter? And by the way, are you keeping up with ALL that I am dealing with?”

I became an excellent actress at work, never letting on that I was dealing with a flooded house, my son’s surgeries and my daughter’s inconsistencies, relying on the God of my secret place.

Often I fell to my knees in a pool of my own tears, asking God, “Why? Why now? Wasn’t it enough, Lord, that my dreams have been shattered and those of my son to play football on a four- year ride? Isn’t it enough, Lord, that I am struggling as a single parent trying to keep all the balls in the air?”

All the while, the Lord remained silent, seemingly unmoved by my physical weariness.

Desperately afraid, confused and unsure, I poured out my guts in Technicolor to a girlfriend, who asked: “What have you done that is so bad that you are suffering?”

For a moment, I fell back and said, “Lord, here is a woman not working as hard as I am to serve you (perception), and she is asking me -- who has fought most my life to serve you -- what I have done to deserve all this pain and sorrow.”

I truly had to resist a head roll.

Recently, the Lord answered a prayer that I have had at His feet for more than 13 years. He did it suddenly, and this time I found myself once again in a pool of my own tears, but this time in celebration of His coming to see about me.

Deuteronomy 28:1-12 provides instruction on both how to wait on the Lord as well as what the rewards are for doing so.

When God shows up, we realize that it was never about our time, but His time. And though it might sound cliché, He knows just when to bless us.

An unanswered prayer is not one that bears no fruit or is designed to frustrate us or cause our faith to waiver, but it teaches us how to stand. Not only that, unanswered prayers protect us by watching for what is up ahead. And finally, an unanswered prayer is training ground chock-full of learning how to hear in the midst of our suffering, even if it appears to be silence.

Now that I am holding in my hand an answered prayer requested many years ago, I realize that everything I had to endure, cry through, suffer through, was all in preparation for where He has positioned me to walk. Without every one of those traumas, failures and skinned knees, I would not be a qualified candidate to assume the role He has designed just for me.
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Tanya Wilson is an inspirational speaker and author who lives in Charlotte. Friend her on Facebook or email her at TW360you@aol.com.

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