By now just about everyone has heard about the unfortunate death of the whale trainer at Florida's Sea World. This is another sad example of humans believing they can trifle with a wild creature known to cause death and injury.

It calls to mind other recent tragedies -- the crocodile hunter, Steve Irwin, who was killed by a stingray; and the entertainer/illusionist Roy Horn (of Siegfried and Roy) who was gravely injured by an adult white tiger.

Briefly, let me share with you three reasons why I steer clear of killer whales.

No. 1: The name
I stay away from any and all things that have the word “killer” preceding or following its name. Serial killer. Killer bees. Killer waves. The silent killer.

About the only killer I will ever hang around is an occasional painkiller. And I am careful with those.

No. 2: The Bible
Long time ago, when I was learning about Dick and Jane and the Three Little Pigs, I also learned about Jonah in the whale. I learned that a whale can swallow you real good – alive – and that you can be down in its belly knocking around for days, looking for a red phone or a button to push to get you up outa there.

I'm claustrophobic. I don't do closed MRI’s. I don't do the back seats of small cars. I don't do whales.

No. 3: I like livin’
Folks who like livin’ don't train killer whales. Folks who like livin’ don't play with tigers. Folks who like livin’ don't go diving in the ocean after stingrays.

There is a lot to be learned from the horror move depiction of the ditzy girl who heads to the basement when she hears a chainsaw start up down there, despite the newspaper on the table with the glaring headline that reads, "Chainsaw killer on the loose -- on your block!"

Then she wonders why she trips over a log while running through the woods trying to get away from the killer’s murderous rage and ends up with her head hangin’ from a tree.

Some folks just seem to want to mess with stuff that ain’t botherin’ them. They seem to think that bears and tigers just won’t eat them.

What gets into some folks to make them believe that they are invincible? To see the size, the teeth, the power of these creatures. To know the reputation of these creatures, and to still believe that you will come to no harm

I've lived long enough to know that sometimes we just need to leave things alone. It no more crosses my mind to play with a killer whale than to play with a serial killer or some killer bees.

If I were a killer, I would be mad, too. That you didn't respect my name. What part of "killer" don't you understand?

Listen up, folks, “killer” means KILLER! Every time. Every day.

***

D. Barbara McWhite grew up in York County and lives in Orange Park, Fla., with her husband and cat.
 

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